Thursday, June 11, 2009

Malvern House - Still No Shame? [UPDATED]

Continuing the Crap Jobs! theme from my previous posting, I notice that the odiously self-regarding MalvernShitHouse outfit are advertising yet again for teaching staff. I reckon they have a permanent ad running on, which seems to give the lie to their statement that "Malvern House is London's favourite college". In fact, it seems to be about as favoured as a rat sandwich by its teachers (which is probably the only meat they can afford).

Of course, I can't let you know exactly how much they plan to pay their unfortunate Tefler-victims this time round, as the ad makes only the usual bland reference to 'competitive rates of pay'. There is mention, though, of a "Summer bonus also applicable to anyone starting before 29th June", but the ad carries no details of its substance. Perhaps they'll give you some free sun-cream, or a bottle of Tesco's white wine to take home?!

What I can offer you, though, is this little insight into the grotty place from my TeflTrade (RIP) website of a couple of years ago. This fine piece of bungling and inept investigative journalism managed to show the school in a typically shabby and corrupt light (no mean achievement, I can tell you).


Malvern House - the School without Shame! [June 2007]

Malvern House is no stranger to the pages of this blog. It has been responsible for at least two postings, the first one way back in April 2005. Back then, they were paying their unfortunate Teflers just 9.50 an hour - and last August they were advertising for teachers and ... paying the same rates. Well, guess how much they're paying them now?

Yes, that WAS a trick question, wasn't it?! You've probably already guessed that nowadays they pay ... exactly the same! And that's even for teachers with the Dip.!! Just take a close look at their most recent appeal for unwary Tefl victims, taken from
  • "Malvern House is fun, lively language school. We are the largest language school in London and the second largest in the U.K."
  • "We have several positions available for the start of the new term, and one position available immediately. Our starting pay is £9.50 an hour; however we do guarantee hours for our teachers. "
Well, I wonder what's 'exciting' about earning less than ten quid an hour - less than 300 quid a week? Still, it's nice to know that they do guarantee the hours - that's really big of them!! And the fact that there is one position available immediately - well, you know what to think, don't you!

Unfortunately, that bit about being the largest EFL school in London, and the second biggest in the UK, is also true. What she failed to add, however, is that it's probably one of the most unethical and corrupt outfits too, if we judge by its past.

You see, Malvern House is owned and operated by the odious Malhotra family, who were responsible for THE biggest EFL scam in London several years ago. Remember Evendine College? Hundreds and hundreds of students left high and dry? Dozens of teachers left unpaid? These articles might serve as a reminder...

There's also this, from a British Council report into dodgy EFL providers:

The Supply of Goods and Services Act is especially pertinent in light of the closure of Evendine College. Evendine College was part of the Anglo Education Group PLC, and owned by Mr. Suresh Malhotra. On Thursday, 19 June, 2003, Evendine College closed its doors without notice to staff or students. Less than a month later, Mr. Malhotra put the college into voluntary liquidation. Many students had paid for courses that Evendine College failed to provide, and were left without any recourse. Around the same time, an investigative journalist’s report had found that Evendine College was one of the many private ELT institutions willing to provide false visa documentation to persons posing as "students".

Well, if that's not unethical - and criminal - then I don't know what is! In fact, Suresh Malhotra was officially banned from running a company for several years. However - surprise, surprise! - his name does appear on other websites as being linked to the school.

Anyway, let's get back to the Director, as Companies House data states that he has an extremely desirable address in the fashionable posh suburb of Chalfont St. Giles. In fact, I looked up the postcode on, and this is what it told me:

31/07/2002 £725,000 [Detached, Freehold] Hollyoak, Nightingales Lane, Chalfont St Giles, Buckinghamshire, HP8 4SF

So, the Malhotras bought their domestic pile almost five years ago (and a year before Evendine College crashed) for a tad under three quarters of a million quid. Property prices have risen substantially since then, however, and it would not be unfair to assume that the current value of that little homestead would be closer to the following more recent prices:

1. 12/03/2007 £1,210,000 [Detached, Freehold] Brackenhurst, Nightingales Lane, Chalfont St Giles, Buckinghamshire, HP8 4SF

2. 30/10/2006 £1,380,000 [Detached, Freehold] Sutton House, Nightingales Lane, Chalfont St Giles, Buckinghamshire, HP8 4SF 3. 28/06/2005

3. £1,850,000 [Detached, Freehold] Wilmers, Nightingales Lane, Chalfont St Giles, Buckinghamshire, HP8 4SF

So, the owners of the largest EFL school in London pay amongst the lowest wages - less than 300 quid a week for properly qualified and experienced EFL professionals - whilst they themselves live in luxury in Buckinghamshire. Interesting that, innit?!

First Published: Thursday, 7 June 2007

Anyway, this year MalvernShitHouse appear to be anticipating a large influx of students (or perhaps a large outflux of teachers) in summer, as they claim "We require experienced teachers for positions from 29th June 2009." If you are indeed desperate enough to work for this bunch of shysters, then magic your CV to, where it will be given a fearsome inspection by the appropriately-named Antonia Corp, who claims to be in charge of recruiting at MalvernShitHouse.

In fact, Miss Corp (I'm presuming she's the unweddable and unbeddable single type) is also no stranger to this very blog, having sent the tart epistle below to Yours Truly some years ago, when I was foolish enough to give her college a cyperspace mauling for offering low-paid jobs dressed up as 'career opportunities'. As you can see, she has a very high opinion of herself and the school that employs her, whilst she apparently prefers to dismiss her EFL teachers as 'losers' and 'Guardian-readers'!

Dear Sandy,

I am assuming you are a 30-something failed actor/artist/writer or suchlike, of the usual ilk that believes that by slagging off their current profession they will somehow feel more satisfied about going to work every day.

I can’t exactly say I was quaking in my boots to find I was mentioned on your pathetic moaning website for losers and readers of the Guardian that we are offering one of the “crappest jobs in tefl”. Perhaps you would care to visit one of our schools and meet some of the 64-strong teaching team, all of whom readily accepted the STARTING salary of £9.50/hr, and have a strong commitment to their students and each other, in turn providing one of the best training grounds for newer teachers, as well as excellent promotional prospects for gifted and experienced teachers.

As the only (and feel free to correct me if you think I am wrong) school in London with a separate team of teachers dedicated to the professional advancement and development of the teaching population at Malvern House (over 75 hrs per week are dedicated to teacher development and training), I think you would agree that £9.50/hr is an excellent salary considering all the benefits (of which there are too many to mention here – completion bonuses, monthly drinks parties, guaranteed hours, permanent contracts etc etc.).

Feel free to pop in next time you have some spare time (which I’m sure won’t be long!) and I’ll show you around. Or maybe you could just ask one of our 10,000 previous students – there are many still in the UK, mostly in good jobs or higher education – if they thought their teacher seemed unmotivated or uncaring.

Antonia Corp
Malvern House London

So, there you go - a lot of charming people at such a charming school! And, just in case you didn't know it already, 9.50 is an 'excellent rate' of pay, at MalvernShitHouse anyway, and such basic things as guaranteed work and permanent contracts are now apparently to be regarded as 'benefits'! That's the modern face of UK Tefl - and don't it suck, eh!?

UPDATE: One of my comrades deep in the Tefl battlefield has advised me that MalverhShitHouse's listing on the British Councils 'UK Accreditation' website is noticeable for its extremely coy presence. In fact, it states the following...

Malvern House, London
Publishable statement withdrawn.

Strange, eh? I mean, if MalvernShitHouse forked out a load of cash to renew their BC accreditation, you think they'd want the world to know, wouldn't you? In fact, what these terse words typically mean is that the school refused to have the statement published - presumably because it wasn't good enough. Or at all!

In fact, you can check out all your favourite (and also the less admired) EFL schools right here:

Have fun!


Anonymous said...

Sandy, you are being unfair this time.

I bet the mortgage must be huge. Teacher's pay is an understandable secondary concern in this case.

Chris said...

I feel for you Sandy, hopefully things will resolve..

Anonymous said...

Malvern House are doing well. Well done Malvern House. Good to see that people are creating employment and helping us out of this financial downturn. If everyone acted like Sandy (or whatever his real name is) and sat on their fat old arse bitching off anyone who does well, this country would be even more fucked.Shame on you Sandy "BITTER CUNT" McManus

The TEFL Tradesman said...

Hey - what's this about my arse being fat? I may be a shade overweight around the buttocks, but you'll find no fat there - it's all pure muscle, I assure you. And it's not all that old, either.

Honestly, some people...!!

Anonymous said...

that Antonia Carp's reply was quite amusing. particularly liked the line about guardian readers... she might be worth checking out.

Anonymous said...

or maybe she was a figment of sandy's imagination

Anonymous said...

Yes-or maybe William Frederickson's size 11 boot is wanted up 'Anus-noncey-mouse's' poxed arse!I am Bernard Cornwell's Sergeant Harper to your Sharpe,Mr Mcmanus-'Anonymous' can go and fuck himself!

William Frederickson

Anonymous said...

you're a captain of twattery you cunt

Anonymous said...

Anonymous,' you are such a wierdo that you are of the late Michael Jackson's opinion that 'I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles' is a smoochy love-song,sir!May you catch an unknown and virulent Strain of AIDS from a fucking gorilla!


caz said...

I notice that Malvern House is located at 29 John Adam Street, London. They are in excellent company indeed. Have a look at the youtube video 'Ark and the Adam's Family', about those in the Adam Street area of London.

Link here:

The TEFL Tradesman said...

Well-observed, dear Caz. It's very nice to get some SENSIBLE comment around here from time to time!

Anonymous said...

Dear Sandy,

I can confirm the rates of pay for teachers at Malvern House are indeed extremely low, as I've recently had the opportunity to discover.

Thank you very much for your posts which gave me a realistic view of this school. All teachers out there, stay away from Malvern House.

The TEFL Tradesman said...

OK mate, spill the beans! How little do they pay nowadays? Just how crap a school is it? We need to know!!

Anonymous said...


The TEFL Tradesman said...

I'm very glad to have been of assistance to you, dearest anon (above). This blog is, afer all, a public service!