Saturday, April 18, 2009

Cleaning Up in South Korea?

I've been left feeling very disappointed after reading that South Korea is no longer the primary destination for the social retard and sexual deviant commonly known as the international EFL teacher. Apparently, according to the article "Confronting Prejudice in South Korea", published in the Guardian Weekly recently, no foreign teachers have been arrested in South Korea in recent years for the use or possession of drugs. Such a shame!

Worse still, the article goes on to really hammer home just how puritan the place has become recently - "2008 government data shows that foreigners are arrested for sex-crimes at one quarter the rate of Korean nationals." Shocking! Of course, this might just mean that foreigners are better at avoiding getting caught out for their misdemeanours, but it does seem to strike a sorry contrast to the days of yesteryear when every small Korean city was apparently teeming with US college rejects in search of more than their fair share of 'oriental spice' and eastern pharmaceuticals.

This is sad news indeed, and shows how rapidly things can change when gullible people are made to believe that all foreign teachers are demonic incubi with backpacks full of illicit substances. It seems only yesterday that the Korean press were up in arms and the general public about to take to the streets to protest against predatory Teflers who seduced young Korean women and made them share their teacher's drugs. In fact, I would have thought that a 2007 internet article entitled "Korea is a Perverted Paradise for Foreign Teachers" would have gone a long way to encourage thousands of your average Tefl tourists to establish themselves in Korea, but apparently not.

Nowadays, prospective Teflers bound for the country of boiled bulldog have to submit to HIV and drug tests, along with criminal background checks and disclosures. Even - heaven help them! - the ones already living there have to prove that they are clean of drugs and shameful sexual diseases! How awful! What an infringement of human rights!!

In fact, I reckon it could be the requirement that they might even be expected to know how to teach that has had a greater determining factor in putting off potential Tefl tourists. No more backpackers with a dodgy certificate from TEFL International now, eh!

However, for me the article puts things very clearly in perspective with its opening paragraph, in which an EFL teacher currently working in Korea states that he has been denied service in bars - "I've been told to leave because I'm a foreigner" he moans. Now, if there's ANYTHING that's bound to put a prospective EFL teacher off going to work in a certain country, it just has to be that!

10 comments:

Shaun Ryder said...

Iss like fookin' Mary Whitehouse runs that fookin' country: there's nothing better than shamblin' back to yer flat with a bag of drugs over one shoulder an' a 'ot Korean bird over the other.
Mind you, it might be that Barbara Wodehouse is involved too-nothing like a boiling 'ot saucepan of water to train them canines, lad.

The Bursa Bonker said...

Turkey's a surprisingly good for the "sexually depraved" EFL teacher - in fact the teacher of any gender with an averagely healthy sex drive. The principle pull of the male Western EFL teacher for the Turkish ladies is that they'll be gone come next July without the bother of them hanging around expecting to marry you, and turning up under your window to sing "Woe is me"-type ballads. Also the fact that absolutely none of the TEFLers have the remotest expectation of getting laid means they self-select the better behaved indidividuals from among themselves, and are pleasantly surprised and very grateful when they inevitably do pull, which makes them nicer to be around.

Anonymous said...

Just reading this is making me horny.

Anonymous said...

Sandy,what the hell has happened here? A picture of an Oriental lady taking a big,hairy dog's cock up her would be more 'appropriate' here,as the loony Left might say!Are you sure that you haven't added the wrong picture to the post?
That man and woman in the picture are covered in brown stuff ,half-naked in case they get 'taken short'and have to get to the lavvie quickly*...Apt for a post about Zimbabwe, unless you are warning us all about the widespread presence of rotting poodle in the Korean restaurants' Kim Chi and noodles.
Wait a minute...too many ales and a bloody chaser of brandy...Ah-ha!The South Koreans are behaving in a manner that would lead one to believe that they are so full of shit that they squeak!

*When i had to train for a boxing match,many years ago,i first lost weight by eating vegetable curry and 'proon'surprise washed down with the best stout...The 'surprise' lies not in the fact that it is full of proons,but in the speed at which the buggers come out the other end several hours later...This diet is known as the 'Shaun Ryder' for some strange reason!

William Frederickson

Anonymous said...

As for Turkey' i remember that during the Nineties,Turkish cities had significant numbers of lady-boys living there...Can anyone tell me that lady-boy shagging is not a homosexual act as long as the tits are held onto at all times during the 'act' and the 'reach-around' is not administered? Some idiot told me that-if he is lying i will have to punch seven shades of shit from him,the bastard!

William Frederickson

Shaun Ryder said...

I likes the lady in that picture, me. Right cheeky little look about 'er. 'Ere, San, where'd that photo come from? I loves them Asian ladies, me.

The TEFL Tradesman said...

It's from my personal collection, Shaunie. No prizes for guessing who the grinning guy is ... or 'was', I suppose! Here's a clue - it's not Paul Lowe!

Anonymous said...

Who was it, Sandy,and did he have diarrhea from rotting poodle in his kim chi or noodles?

William Frederickson

The TEFL Tradesman said...

Ah, you mean the evil Dr Kim? I haven't heard from him for a few weeks now - perhaps he's out hunting domestic doggy for his next dinner?

Where are you, my dear Doc.?!

Anonymous said...

Definitely not,Sandy old shagger-i mean that vile fermented cabbage that the buggers eat.I believe that the Koreans bury it -or as my father,a former holder of Her Brittanic Majesty's Commission reckoned,store it up their arseholes till it rots.

William Frederickson